Eternal bliss

The icy splash on the cold water paralysed her, the combined weight pulling her below the surface, gulps of water pummelling into the lungs as she tried to breath in desperately! Bereft of air, a terrible agony spread quickly through her numbing all her senses! The throes of unbearable suffering persisted for a while, hands and legs twitching, jerking, every single cell hopelessly yearning for dear oxygen as life slowly but irreversibly ebbed!! And then there was peace, complete peace! She was sleeping cosily in her mother’s lap, sucking her bosom as she lovingly held her, singing a lullaby! An apparition, as if a blue green yellowish glow seemed to lift her, she felt lighter than an air bubble, and then there was void, absolute, infinite void ………

………A child was born. The child was born into a family of conservative Brahmins, a family that was male dominated, the eldest one being way past teenage, the younger ones with little age difference among them. Thus the new born child was like a heaven sent angel, a beacon of light into a house that was yearning for a daughter and a sister, God being condescending at last. The youngest brother of the new born was elder by ages. The mother, already beyond her prime, a buxom lady, was greatly embarrassed, understandably with her abdominal bulge as the months progressed, trying to hide it with loosely fitted wardrobe, mostly in vain. Sheer joy and ecstasy engulfed the house, a fervent prayer has been fulfilled! An angel has been born! The house reverberated with Ululudhani, blowing of conch shells, chanting of mantras to mark the propitious occasion! Neighbours and relatives alike gathered to share their moment of joy……..

The baby grew up in leaps and bounds, mostly in the lap of Binod, the eldest one, who acted both as a mother, father and nurse, often wetting his clothes with her bowel movements, feeding and swaying her to sleep in his arms, singing lullabies he remembered his mother singing to all his younger ones! The baby would giggle happily as he would tease her, delicately fingering her rosy cheeks, pecking gentle kisses on her soft body, feeling a divine bondage with his youngest sister, a cherubic little angelic doll!

She was now in sixth standard at a local Girl’s Vernacular school in Shillong. Her residence was about 15/20 minutes walk from her school, not that far but invariably she would rush through her meals, often half eaten despite her mother’s incessant cajoling. She would always be in a hurry, full of excitement, merriment in her every step. She was very young, in her early ninth. She had already become the cynosure of all eyes, with milky fair rosy complexion, a perfectly chiselled face, delicate in every detail, a divine smile pampering her dimpled cheeks, strands of dark mushroom brown curly hair falling over her large almond eyes in abandon. Her fluffy dimpled baby cheeks would tremble with every laughter, a divinely sweet laughter that would resonate in everyone’s ear with delight, craving to hear the sweet melody in her voice again and again. Endowed with feminine promises, harbinger of what she would blossom into, her very presence would radiate a heady attraction like bees to a rose garden. She was intelligent too,with a capacity to grasp like a swooping sponge.

She was from an upper class brahmin family and the youngest among five children, of whom the eldest was a bodybuilding enthusiast with a kind of reputation of a muscleman in and around the locality. She was a pampered, mollycoddled one since her childhood, being the youngest and only girl among the male dominated children. she would be called by any endearing name, ‘Maina’ by her mother ‘Laahori’ by father, ‘Lalima’ by eldest brother,any of the above or ‘Majoni’ by other brothers. Her school recorded name was ‘Dipannita’, a name chosen by her doting father, her arrival lighting up the home like a thousand lamps as would be on a Dipawali night. She would be called ‘Dipa’ and sometimes ‘Laahori’ by her school mates.

……….He was in his eighth standard studying in an elite English Missionary school, a handsome boy of more than average height, very fair complexioned, only son of inter caste parents. His father was an well to do businessman, mother claiming her parentage to an ethnic tribe of the foothills of Himalayas. His normal routine was to hurry to his school, situated a far from his residence, through a short cut way to make up for the time that he would normally waste getting up late. And the short cut road was a long distance away from the Girls’ Vernacular school. A classmate of him, studying in the same Missionary school would accompany his sister, a classmate of Dipannita, and drop her in her school on his way to his destination. He would often meet his sister’s friend, Dipa, on the way and felt enamoured by her beauty and exuberance. Being very meek and cowardly, he kept his feelings secret from his sister, lest she might complain at home! He would very rarely converse with her, was very self conscious and tongue tied, would only utter in monosyllables when a must response was in waiting, but inwardly he desperately longed and imagined himself conversing sweet little things that he thought she loved hearing form him. Being impotent to converse all by himself, he sought assistance from his closest friend, and cajoled him to accompany him to their school together, though it meant a longer distance to cover for his friend. Being equally intrigued and excited, he would thenceforth make up the time by getting up early, much to the bemused and a bit elated mother for his new found zest, and would accompany his friend on his way to school almost everyday.

Dipa was in her own world, hardly ever noticing the presence of another admirer, in her hurry to reach her school in time, all the way excitedly blubbering about something that was nothing, laughing and giggling in her mesmerizing demeanor,enchanting her companions all the more. Suman was almost insane with a compulsive attraction, her every word and laughter and giggle piercing his virgin heart. He would chip in with some funny anecdotes in the midst of her torrent of flowing monologue, a gift of the gab that he was unaware he possessed, in his compelling desire to impress her. And she would burst out with laughter, a dulcet laughter that echoed in his tender heart.

And so the foursome would everyday proceed to their schools, synchronizing their timing with Dipa’s arrival. Dipa was always her boisterous self, unaware that she too was unconsciously looking forward to meeting him as they would proceed to their respective schools together. His friend’s sister, Munmi as she would be called, too had a crush on him, and would hang on his every word with rapt attention, with complementary comments that she thought would impress him. His friend, being very meek but inwardly longing to catch Dipa’s attention, would react to every anecdote the duo exchanged with laughter even when it was not funny. And so the days passed by, each one rarely missing their short journey together, each one trying to impress their respective crush, except for Dipa, who was always her ebullient self, exuberant in her endless excitement.

Days passed into a year, and then another, the chemistry among the foursome jelled, it seemed natural to Dipa that she would off course meet him during their brief sojourn to school together everyday when the school was open, and so was Suman too. He felt her presence almost all the time, as if he could touch her fragrance, her lilting laughter in his unconscious self. Being senior to her, he passed out from school level with a good grade and so did Priyom, Munmi’s elder brother and got admitted into the under graduate course in the same missionary institution. But they adjusted their timing and the foursome togetherness continued…..And the day came when Dipa and her friend too passed out from school, Dipa off course with flying colors and Munmi too, not far behind.

During their school days, the time that they were together was rather for a short duration, the distance to school from their randevu point being not much. Now that they were all at under graduate level, Dipa and Munmi in a Missionary Women’s College, not far from the boy’s, the foursome now had had ample time to spend together. They would very often sit together in restaurants, chatting, laughing, whiling away their time,after or in between class hours, most of the time at the expense of Suman’s pocket, and so the bondage grew, especially between Suman and Dipa, without any of them realising the depth of their togetherness. The brother sister duo, Munmi and Priyom, could only behold, bereft of response from their respective crush, feeling pangs of one sided infatuation every moment of their togetherness. With the passage of time, they grew more supportive of the other two, suppressing their own feelings, unknowingly and unwittingly, as they became very intimate among themselves. In those times,possibly because of some underlying Sanskaras( social restrictions) that had built up over the ages. an undefined barrier was ever present in mingling among opposite genders, and therefore, the foursome meeting together was somewhat unusual. Munmi’s brother, unconsciously saddled by this latent age old social prohibition had found himself frozen in presence of a female company, and became dumb and tongue tied in expressing himself. Suman, however, had had no such qualms, being the son of a mother that belonged to a community where free mingling among both genders were taken for granted.

Winter vacation! Suman had to accompany his parents to their mother’s ancestral home in the foot hill countryside of Himalayas for a Month’s time.

The ancestral home was full with people, a joint family of three generations, quite a few of whom, doing service in different parts of India, most in the defense services, had managed to avail brief furloughs for the rare family get together, that seldom fructified once in a long while. But Suman was lonely, very lonely! He had had rarely a minute to be alone unto himself, almost all the time in the midst of warm cacophony of family chatter, but he was away, far away, detached, an immense sense of emptiness engulfing him. He did not understand what hit him, he felt as if his heart was turning inside with uncontrollable ache, he felt totally numb with the pain, nothing mattered but the pain, oh! how painful! what happened to me, he thought! He was day dreaming! She was giggling heartily at one of his funny comments!! He looked around!? Where is she?? He heard her ?! But then reality struck him with an icy pang! Someone else was laughing, his cousin sister! what were they doing here!! His kith and kin, excited and happy to be together after long gaps, nudged him, expecting him to mingle with them with equal fervour, a bit intrigued with his stoic silence. For him, the vacation was no vacation, only an impatient counting of days, how soon would the vacation be over! how soon could he get back and be with Dipa! To him now nothing else mattered, he was totally submerged in her, her every single move coming alive in his memory. ……

The winter had set in with an icy drizzle, pebbles of tiny snow flakes rained down incessantly on the tin roof, as if a thousand drum beats were playing in harmony to a distant hymn, the wheezing cold icy wind piercing through the warm clothes as Dipa sat by the window looking absent minded at the falling snow flakes that seemed to weave a white carpet on the manicured lawn, and she shivered with the cold. She was far away, dreaming of the day when she first saw him, met him. The demure and innocent way of his greetings, a little embarrassed. Embarrassed! what for? His shy sideways glance at her, the shy stare resting on her face with admiration for an instant longer, then quickly looking away, a bit embarrassed, yes, that was why! When would he be back! It had been so long! Why should he go on vacation now! How could he keep her waiting alone and enjoy a vacation! She felt mortified thinking that he should go on any vacation leaving her alone! It was so unjustified! And then suddenly she felt as if she could not breathe! Something was churning inside her tender heart! She trembled involuntarily! She felt her heart beating rapidly, wildly! Her breathing seemingly got stuck in the pit of her lungs, as if! And then a deep sigh brought out an unbearable anguish and she started crying, not knowing why she cried so uncontrollably! But then she felt her deep emotion was so soothing, she wished her crying would not stop, the churning inside her, the ache was so painfully inviting! So endearing his thoughts were!………

Both parents of Dipa were devout simple persons, and Dipa had to accompany her mother to religious gatherings frequently, even though she had had no fervour in those meets, but her mother would invariably have her daughter by her side, more out of pride to exhibit her immense beauty, who seemed to resemble her as she was in her prime, than a genuine desire for her daughter’s spiritual preaching. On this day too, a special prayer was afoot, where a renowned spiritual Guru was due to deliver a religious discourse on the Bhagawata. Her mother found her sitting by the window, forlorn, sad and crying all alone! Taken aback, she became mad with concern, her daughter, full of life and laughter, who never ever knew sadness, was crying all alone!! Pulling abreast her tear stained cheeks as if she was still a baby, consoling her with endearing words, not at all wondering about the cause of her sorrow, all she could think was that her baby was crying. Dipa sobbed all the more, silently, with deep anguish, as she buried her face in her mother’s embrace. And she blurted out, ‘ he is so mean, bad’! Her mother misunderstood her, thinking about the mild scolding her eldest son had berated her with on some flimsy grounds earlier that day!

Her mother consoled, ‘don’t be upset my child, these male folk never would understand a women’s tender heart, pull yourself together, child, be patient and strong’! Dipa continued sobbing, warm in her mother’s lap, slowly passing into a fitful slumber. She ignored her neighbour’s impatient calls, bluntly refusing to attend the gathering, lest her dear daughter, restful in her arms, got disturbed! …..

Winter vacation was over. They met again on the very first day of their colleges opening, but this time the enormous attraction they felt for each other was almost palpable, as if some invisible force was pulling them frantically, words were meaningless, eye contact was enough, volumes were said silently, each feeling the other’s heartbeat! An indescribable togetherness, an immense feeling of sublime warmth engulfed both! And warm tears trickled down each other’s cheeks. And so they continued meeting each other, day after day, both Munmi and Priyom acting more as catalysts in their frequent escapades. Getting bolder day after day, they would now frequent the Wards Lake, not very far from their college campus, a serene, cool and shaded paradise that stimulated the lover’s bondage ever so more.

Ward’s lake, lying close to the Raj Bhawan, adorned the center of Shillong town with its lush green flower garden, lofty pine trees providing cool shades to the enchanted visitors, the serene grassy slopes surrounding the horse shoe shaped lake, a perfect resting place for dreamy fantasy, a lover’s paradise! Named after the then Chief Commissioner of Assam, Sir William Ward, designed by Engineer Fitzwilliam Thomas Pollok, which was why also called Pollok’s lake and built by colonel Hopkins in the year 1894, the most impressive landscape developed by a Khasi prisoner, an immaculately designed white wooden bridge overlooking the greenish bed of water at its center, the lake, a silent spectator to a myriad love odysseys of bygone days!

They would find a lonely spot among the lush shades on the grassy slopes, sit side by side, closely knit, her fragrance overwhelming him with a heady tenderness, and they would frequent the spot every now and then. They would sometimes get down at the bus stop, on their way back home, accompanied by their ever constant companion, Munmi and Priyom, in the bright afternoon, the cool evening still far away, and with an impulsive desire to be together for a while longer, they would saunter into the Lady Hydari Park near by, their companions leaving them alone ……

………..With pristine gardens and exquisitely trimmed lawns, the park was an ideal resting place away from the busy hubbub of the town. The park was created in the year 1937 when Sir Robert Neil Reid was the Governor of Assam whence it was known as Lady Reid Pleasure Park. Later, when Sir Akbar Hydari took over as the Governor of Assam on 4th May 1947, the Park was renamed as Lady Hydari Park. The Park also served as a meeting place for various functions, both Governmental as well as for other purposes, as and when the occasion arose……

…… Deeply absorbed as they were, time elapsed quickly, only realising how late they were when the lights were switched on as the dusk set in, anxiety sweeping both with the lateness of the hour. They hurried back, had to cook up an excuse explaining their unusual time of arrival at home! It was the first time Dipa lied to her mother, mildly feeling guilty as her mother and others were so easily duped believing her totally.

……Dipa’s father was a portly, corpulent person, dhoti clad, a government employee and was fully involved in all social activities and rituals that the community observed, which was quite often. A large man, his very appearance gave the impression of piousness, imbued with humility. and commanded respect and veneration by his very bearing . ……In the office room where he worked, was also occupied by a few other employees, both senior and junior. Wearing a dhoti was their common garb, besides, they had similar bent of mind over religious and spiritual matters. The room was commonly known in the entire office block as the dhoti room! The common pep talk of the group was the religious and social activities that was in the offing or the ones that was yet to come, and off course discussions on the various scriptures.There were discussions on the deteriorating values, growing tendency towards unethical degradation of customarily held traditions and social bindings mostly among the younger generation, which, they believed, portended ill for preservation of their age old culture in the coming days, and they were distressed with the decadence. A recent incident of a high caste brahmin young man eloping and eventually marrying a local tribal girl, a girl who belonged to a different faith with very different food habits, with a contrasting upbringing and a quaint tongue, the daughter of a way side tea seller, was widely discussed. Dipa’s father was aghast! utterly dismayed! the shock had rattled him deeply! It was a very impure and sinful relationship that was taboo in his society….. But alas! he was as yet blissfully unaware of the dark clouds gathering in his own home!…….

……..Spring had arrived! Bougainvillea, forget-me-nots, cherry blossoms had bloomed in all their glory! The expanse of the garden with lines of conifer thuja plants, roses of variant colours, all immaculately manicured and laid out, beyond the court yard up to the frontal pathway, it indeed presented a delightfully exquisite view. Sitting by the window, and gazing at the blooming flowers while fantasising herself with her beloved, it was her most favourite leisurely pastime! Today she was extremely elated, they would be together in the evening, a musical function was organised in the Lady Hydary park on the occasion of the advent of the Bohagi new year ( Baishakhi, new year month according to Hindu calendar), bihu dancing( a vibrant indigenous folk dance unique to Assam) troupes as well as very popular singers were going to grace the occasion, it would be a night of merriment. She would off course be accompanied by her elders, but it should pose no problem to dupe them in the thick milieu, besides, what was the use of her friends, if not in such times! They managed two seats in a relatively dark corner, friends close by, so as to ward of any possible detection of unusual association, and romance overflowed, High octaves of Bhupen Hzarika’s voice, laced with poignant verses, trans descended the duo into a surreal cuckoo land !!……..

…….. She was all of seventeen going on eighteen, and her creator was in a highly romantic mood as He poured the nectar of fairies in her physical form, a flush, blushing, pinkish white velvety skin, The golden ratio in the formation of her enticing figure perfectly placed, dividing the body in the perfect ratio of 0.618 from feet to navel and 0.382 from navel to top of head! The ratio working in exquisite tandem in her avatar, the Creator in his rare artistic element as her female form flourished. Immaculately perfect neckline resting on rounded snow white shoulders, that slowly descended to ascend exquisite mounts, that the slender waist would almost buckle under their weight! only to be countered by precisely heavy bottoms that tapered down in gorgeous proportion to the delicate rose petal feet! The long ivory neck holding the angelic face was almost endless!

The elderly denizens of the entire locality would fondly invite her to their homes, with a wistful desire to liven themselves up in her warm company. The damsels would be jealous of and the youth would furtively ogle at her to guzzle her sublime beauty that her very personae radiated. But an innocent teenager that she was, she was totally ignorant of her own beauty! Her parents and all her brothers were jealously protective of her and always kept a silent watch on anyone trying to get unusually closer. The neighbourhood and beyond were all eager for her company but preferred to keep a safe distance in deference to her eldest brother, who was the local muscle man, and a known Dada.

College week! Dipa had an additional quality of singing, and she sang heartily! Her melodious voice mingled with her mesmerising beauty had an enthralling impact on the audience, all the college students were ga ga about her, not to speak of the sporting prowess she revealed in athletic events. Overnight, she was a celebrity in the college fraternity, not only in her own but in others too. It was gradually getting difficult for her to go around unnoticed very often, and so the duo were seen together and the rumour spread!

It was raining cats and dogs, thunder and lightening shook the house, rain water gushed along in torrents as Suman sat on the veranda unmindful of the furious rain God’s antics that was on full display. He was deep in thought, wondering how mesmerising it would be to be together with Dipa with the rain soaking them both. A prolonged thunder reverberated that made him shudder involuntarily, the rain getting stronger and stronger as he mused on his beloved, and with an impulse he promised a visit to the waterfalls together.

They sat at a vantage point from the Beadon Bishop falls that flowed majestically from the high hills, burbling through rocks, cascading down to a deep gorge to merge with the Umiam river further down stream! caressing her soft hands on his palm, her fragrance mixed with the blowing wind enveloping him, togetherness almost divine, lost with the verdant greenery, they felt transcended into a dream world. There was only the gurgling, roiling water submerging all other noise, but for the swooshing wind that sang through the pine trees.

It was inevitable! As usual they were in their favourite spot in the Ward’s Lake, sitting close by, holding each other’s hand, lost in fantasy, oblivious to the surrounding, unaware of the prying eyes. Her eldest brother’s friend, a family regular at Dipa’s house, was also coincidentally loitering in the lake with his female beau, and as he casually and stealthily glanced around at other visitors, a seemingly familiar face unexpectedly flashed at a tangent at the corner of his eye. Astonished, he furtively looked with more attention, not believing his eyes. The young male companion, too, appeared to be somewhat familiar to him. His personal impression of Dipa was more of a pure and innocent soul, and as such he was immensely taken aback by the chance encounter. He felt he must have a chat with his friend, a budding relationship that must be nipped in the bud!!

Binod did not believe his friend, thought he might have mistaken with some other couple, or more likely out of jealousy, and paid no heed to the attempted slur on her reputation. His friend, feeling slighted for being ignored, insisted to accompany him to the lake or have a first hand evidence by himself. Binod was annoyed at his persistence, uncertain, it could not be true! The very thought aroused in him an unknown trepidation! A rising anger at the very thought that some strange person was growing intimate with his beloved sister!! Reluctantly, against his will, and feeling somewhat guilty too, he decided to keep an eye on his doting sister after she left for the college, albeit clandestinely.

Being together off and on since their school days, the companionship had grown to a regular habit, and as time passed, they were less and less discreet of prying eyes, a complacence that would ultimately bring unforeseen distress that they did not even dream of! It did not take him long to spot them in the grassy slopes of the lake. He stood transfixed, unable to believe his eyes! White hot rage bolted through his veins, not because of his sister’s debauchery but for the very close proximity of a strange Gamin urchin who intimately held her! He lost his control, shouted at his sister, ‘LALIMA’!! and at the same instant caught hold of Suman’s shirt collar, slapped him with full force, hit him hard left, right and centre! his anger grew as he continued to hit him, until he was rescued by other visitors who were drawn by the commotion. Suman lay on the grass half conscious, blood oozing out of his mouth and nose as Binod forcibly led a howling, crying Dipa out of the lake.

He lay prostate on the grassy slope, moaning, unable to move, excruciating pain shooting through his whole body and face! A few regulars, who had seen the duo sitting at the same lover’s spot frequently, took pity on him, carried him to a taxi, and dropped him at his residence, narrating the whole incident to their anxious and panicky parents. Gloom and anguish descended on a family that was so long filled with harmony and happiness! Suman was hospitalised. He was diagnosed with a critically broken nose, a few broken teeth, severely bruised muscles and other complications. He lay in bed for a week in the hospital, thereafter released for home care for about a month, confined to his bed.

The mishap and aches in his body notwithstanding, Suman was drowned with an anguish and apprehension as to what suffering might have befallen Dipa. Lying in bed, with a tortured mind completely fixated on his paramour’s helpless and pathetic situation, he would involuntarily shudder and cry out aloud, body hot with high fever. His anxious parents, sitting by his side, treating with best of medication available, were desperately evaluating a practical way out of this terrible situation. As parents, they were also considering if they should approach her family but negated the thought, considering that the girl’s parents were orthodox upper caste brahmins, whereas they belonged to a caste that would be considered inferior and would immediately be rejected, possibly be insulted too. They consoled and tried to make him understand the futility of the relationship and leave the girl alone. They even considered looking for a descent and deserving bride who would definitely make him happy and help forget his temporary infatuation, a relationship that is destined to be fatal. Suman just lay on the bed, silent and mute.

As Binod ushered in a whimpering, moaning Dipa, her panicked mother, dropping the tray of tea cups she was carrying, frantically caught hold of her, questioningly staring with apprehension at her eldest son. Others stood transfixed with an anxious premonition as if the appalling situation bore an ill omen, seemingly impossible. As Binod dramatically harangued the scoundrel with whom he found his sister sitting intimately holding his hand, with choice expletives, his mother, in a fit of rage and revulsion, slapped him, immediately regretting her impulsive action. Binod went out in a whiff, without uttering a word. Dipa lay on her bed, weeping, mother sitting beside her,unable to form words of consolation, as she herself felt aghast with the turn of events. As if from nowhere, dark clouds gathered in the overcast sky, shadows growing thicker. Distant howling of some nocturnal predators wafted along, an oddly bizarre one, as a chilling gust of wind whistled through turning the house in total darkness as light flickered out.

………..His continuous absence from college gave vent to a rumour that he was physically assaulted badly for his relationship with Dipa. More so because Dipa had come to the college after a gap of about ten days, a completely changed person, sans her usual boisterous self, a sad looking face, without her usual customary smile! Though Munmi had visited her at home 2/3 times, concerned that she was from her absence in college, did not brook the subject of her lover, lest the household overhear their secret talk, her mother frequenting her room every now and then. Now that she met priyom and listened to the agony that Suman was suffering from, Dipa broke down and started crying inconsolably, oblivious to the scene that she was creating in a public place. She urged fervently to visit his home,to meet him in his time of agony! It was a formidable effort for her friends to dissuade her, as she cried more desolately!

It was almost a month that Suman was allowed to go to college,bandage marks still prominent on his face.His friends were desperate that Dipa and Suman did not meet openly, and so they arranged a private spot in a solitary place. They held each other and wept on and on, Dipa holding his bruised face in both her palms. Grief, separation and acute concern for each other had thickened their bondage so much so that they almost became carefree of other worldly environs, as if they would challenge any formidable obstruction coming their way. And so they found another idyllic spot, quite afar from their hitherto frequented sites! The Golf link……..

The Shillong Golf Course, also known as Golf Link and Glen Eagles of the East( as called in United States Golf Association Museum) with eighteen holes, was established in 1898 by British Civil Servants for leisurely activities. Snuggled between sloppy lush green valleys and encircled by pine and rhododendron trees and situated at an astounding height of 5200 ft. it is one of the oldest Golf courses in Asia.

Often they would drop out from their classes, meet at prefixed spot and taxi away to their idyllic location and the escapade continued for some time.

Binod was suspicious,. they possibly were still meeting each other, though they were not frequenting at the lake, which he often surreptitiously inspected. He decided to follow the route in which Suman would return at the opportune time after college, alighting at the City Bus stop. Inevitably, as he furtively observed from a distance, saw them getting off, walking a distance together, close together! and part ways as they clasped each other tightly, before going their separate ways.

The demon in Binod larked! It cannot be! it should not be! how dare he even after the vicious beating! He caught him on his way,walking alone, and hit him and hit him and hit him, until his bloodied body lay on the ground twitching and shaking, froth oozing out of the corner of his mouth! He somehow reached home, with the help of some sympathetic passers by.

His petrified parents, with uncontrollable anxiety, tended their beloved son, darkness looming as they frantically thought of a way out of this hopeless situation. They considered lodging a complaint with the police, but then others forbade such an action, arguing that this would only exacerbate the enmity, may boomerang on themselves and their son. An elderly relative suggested that Suman should preferably be kept away, out of this town, may be admitted to some different course, in an institution that may also give a direction to his career. The idea stuck, found to be a very pragmatic suggestion, and so he was admitted to an agricultural course in an Institution far from home. They thought and hoped that separation for a long period might dim his obsession and in time would dilute his passion.

Suman was devastated and helpless. No matter how much he rebelled, there was no one who would support him, though everyone were in anguish. The tidings reached her with a trident literally impaling the core of her heart, the pain and grief literally tearing her apart. She lay on bed completely ashen faced, trembling with desolation and distress, teary eyes looking blankly into a bottomless abyss, only darkness! Suman was desperate to see her at least once, even if for a fleeting glance, but alas! he was guarded all the while before his final departure, and thus he sat on his seat in the bus, father accompanying, alone and away from his beloved, the whole world conspiring against him, against her, his entire face turning crimson with agony as if iron pricks were being nailed thereon…………

Dipa would go around her daily routine as if in a continuous state of hallucination, automatically moving around doing her chores as though a mechanical robot is keyed to perform, her mind and soul far away, pining for a lost mate. She would continue to go to her college as usual, sans her boisterous self, would covet company of her intimate friend Munmi, if only for pouring out her agonised heart. Her parents and relatives, distressed and troubled that they were, were at their wit’s end, inventing and rejecting alternate options that might and would distract and lift her from her gloom. An elderly person came up with a practical solution, hopefully, and proposed that Deepa’s marriage to a suitable, handsome and eligible groom of even caste would definitely mitigate and alter the situation.Her parents were aghast at the idea, she was so young, in her college, a very bright student,dreams of her career reaching dizzy heights! all the hopes dashed to the ground with a marriage to an unknown person!? No no! impossible?! And so they would let the idea lie latent and hibernate, and would pray and pray more, religious persons that they were, both visiting places of worship diligently ever more, Deepa, of course towed along, a mechanical doll only following.

And so days passed, without any change in her behaviour, pining and withering in the depths of her core, physical symptoms now slowly showing in her otherwise perfect complexion. Spots of whitish grey started appearing in small patches, movements seemingly laboured, food intake noticeably lesser. It was a distress call, a clarion call for her parents, the changes not escaping their scrutiny. They reluctantly felt that marriage was possibly the only practical option that might alleviate and alter her condition, with a new home and a husband, however distressful the decision weighed on their hearts. Now the most difficult and dreadful part, how to brook the subject with Deepa! Of course the task rested with her mother, she being the only person who can chat intimately in an otherwise male dominated home. The reaction surprised her mother beyond her wits, Deepa nonchalantly said yes!!? An impossible task made easy!!!They all seemed happy with a heavy rock like burden weighing on their minds, uncertain whether the proposal actually did register in her agonised mind. No noticeable change seemed to manifest in her demeanour, as though it was a routine affair. Never the less, the word spread in their ancestral home in upper plains, and the fervour for the search of a suitable groom caught up like a hysteria, her reputation of sublime beauty and charm being no secret. They had a tough time selecting the best suitable groom among a host of very many suitable grooms. A handsome youth from a wealthy family of high brahmin caste, well qualified, in Government service, a class one officer in a senior post, was their ultimate choice among the milieu. Deepa’s parents were elated, such a match was heaven sent, definitely, their fervent prayers being answered by the almighty, yes, there might be delay in God’s grace, but not in vain!! never in vain!!! What is there in love! It is only an infatuation! Like water droplets on lotus leaves!! without roots, may drop of any time and gone!? Deepa must be made to realise the futility of her vain affection for a low caste vermin, however seemingly in love he may appear, destined to fade away in time like a pricked balloon! The groom and their family not even insisting to see the bride in person, even committing to allow continuation of her studies after marriage, their only wish was to hold the marriage ceremony as early as possible, their son having agreed to this proposal, after steadfastly rejecting any idea of marriage for so long.

It was all feverish activity thereafter, jewellery and gold ornaments to be selected and made, what with bangles, necklaces, earrings etc etc and of course choicest dresses for the bride as well as for the groom and so on and on. An auspicious date, mutually convenient, was fixed in the earliest favourable month as per Hindu calendar. As the wedding was still a few months away, they had had some time preparing, raising of funds in a very short time being the primary concern, the family being though comfortable, yet not a considerably wealthy one. Side by side,the long list of guests to be invited, the relatives to be informed, finalisation of ornaments, jewellery and all other paraphernalia needed meticulous attention, the wedding invitation being left to a later date.

Among all these feverish activity, Deepa remained nonchalant, hardly noticing the change in behaviour of her parents and brothers, her entire thought and mind occupied by pain and longing for her lost l’amour. She seemed to lose all jest for life, nothing seemingly had any significance to her. She laid bare her distressful situation to her friend, sighing and crying at the same time, that everything was lost for her, that life had had no meaning to her any more. Munmi would console her,telling her everything was going to be fine, whatever weakness she now felt would get diluted and vanish in time. She was specifically advised, rather warned in no uncertain terms by Deepa’s mother, “Munmi, you are her best friend, don’t you ever try to stoke the waning fire, make fulsome effort to make Deepa understand the futility of her affliction and never ever bring up the subject of that virmin with Deepa, and support us in the arrangements of marriage.”

Since Suman’s departure, Deepa had written a number of letters expressing her love and steadfast attachment to him, no matter what hindrances or adversity that may befall her, and had given those to Munmi to somehow deliver them. She was apprehensive of writing and receiving letters from him directly, lest she might be caught in the process. At the initial months of their separation, letters were delivered both ways through Munmi and Priyom, though rather reluctantly. They discouraged any communication, were reluctant to assist further as the months passed by, both being very scared of Deepa’s eldest brother, lest he came to know of their collusion. Indeed, with the marriage finalised, they were specifically warned by him not to act as a conduit with that evil wretch, or else……

The terrible news reached Suman as though a giant beast shot a fireball literally through his bare chest, midsection laid bare, blood dripping, leaving him as a living dead, the unbearable agony of burning fire made him loose all senses. He lay on his bed not knowing for how long, immobilised, almost unconscious, trembling uncontrollably, losing the power of thought! An overwhelming feeling of total loss, as if the essence of his soul was draining out and sinking in an endless void, engulfed him. He did not know that he was crying, when his room mate came in. As he lay supine without responding, only heaving with an irregular breathing, the roommate picked up the open letter and read the contents. He was aware of Suman’s deep love affair and felt terribly sorry for him. He consoled him, that everything was not lost, the wedding was still far off, that if he was a real man, then he should show his manhood. That there were examples galore of desperate lovers taking bold actions, that history was replete with such bravery……… An impulse of a reckless courage grew inside him, he would go and snatch Deepa away from her home, come what may!! He immediately got up, hurriedly packed and left for the bus stand accompanied by his mate.

As the wedding day neared, invitation cards, exquisitely designed, were printed, elaborately giving details of bride and groom, both so highlighted to catch more attention to the bride than to the groom, albeit subtly. Proudly hoping that the card would generate a shy and demure response, Deepa’s mother lay it before her, expectantly waiting her reaction. At first she cast her gaze casually, as though it was an object of no consequence. She held the card in her hands, casually admiring the design and paper quality, without bothering about the contents therein. Observing her apparent desultory reaction, her mother left to attend to other errands. Deepa held the card in her hands for a while, speaking to herself, ‘oh, it is a wedding card, whose wedding’, and then she read the contents slowly, mouthing them to herself. She wondered, it was about Deepannita’s wedding with some one called Nibir. And then a lightning bolt of shock pierced through her heart, as if literally slicing it apart, as the true import and profound reality of marriage sank in, that had so long eluded her, apparently unreal and distant! ‘THE WEDDING IS MY WEDDING’! Instantly she became ashen, shuddering with dread, her beautiful face growing dark, drained of blood, goose bumps of an unearthly primeval horror engulfing her as she started trembling uncontrollably! sharp bolts of agonising pain made her hair roots erupt with smelting sweat! IT IS UNTHINKABLE, NO NO!! I CANNOT MARRY ANY BODY ELSE! IT IS IMPOSSIBLE! THERE MUST BE A WAY OUT! THERE SHOULD BE A WAY OUT!! EVERY ONE IS AGAINST ME!! And she lay there, whole body shaking, unable to think coherently, crying breathlessly! Her mother peeked in, saw her lying on bed, face down, apparently crying fitfully. Thinking her crying to be a natural reaction, ‘all maidens cry before their imminent marriage, they would leave their parental home for ever and so would naturally feel saddened’, she let her be, to cope with her mental state in her own way.

Suman, since the day he landed in the Agriculture university, had been thrown into a whirlwind of activity, be it with the unending lessons and class room chores, or with the classmates antics. The seniors were a nightmare, compelled to entertain their absurd demands. He seemed to have no time to grieve for his paramour, even in his room, the mate continuously chattering all along. Only when his room mate slept at last, that he was alone. With his sleep laden eyes, heart aching with thoughts of Deepa, that he would finally drift into a fitful slumber. He would wake up thinking of her, feeling remorseful and guilty of leaving her behind, wondering how she was without him around. Time was an unending chain of thorns from which he had no respite, as rapidly sparse tidings, via his friends, had almost stopped! His profound sense of hollowness only deepened, consumed by an agony and longing, a heart ache that paralysed him, uncertainty and loss of contact fuelling burning fire of pangs.

Deepa grew restless, desperate. Wedding date was fast approaching, there was no time! If anything was to be done, it should be done immediately. And so, out of desperation, she beseeched her friend Munmi to anyhow make contact with Suman and let him come and save her from her deathtrap. ‘She was ready to go any where, live with Suman in any situation, any condition, only wish was to release herself from her present dire situation, marrying an unknown person called Nibir is unthinkable, impossible. It cannot happen, it should not happen! It is sooo wrong! Why should everybody conspire against her, she had only chosen her soulmate,who was so understanding, so good, so handsome, so caring, so lovable! What sin had she done by letting her soul merge with that of him! It was ordained! Otherwise why would he appear in my life!’

Munmi was nervous. She felt profoundly sad for her friend, her whole being wanted Deepa to be with her loved one. On the other hand, the wedding was inevitable, she was warned against any attempt on her part to make contact with Suman, now or ever. Caught in an acute conundrum that demanded their true allegiance, Munmi and Priyom answered the call of conscience. Deepa was their friend, a friend since childhood, they shared their joy and sorrow together, now she was being driven into a life that she never wanted, a life that would draw them apart, would not possibly know when they would meet again. And so, as a token of friendship, as a token of their immense sympathy, they decided to let Deepa’s desperate tidings reach Suman. And so they let Suman know that Deepa was getting married, that she was leaving from his life for ever, that he should not grieve, that he should and must pray for her a happy married life.

He arrived home at an untimely hour. His parents became apprehensive, his academic session was in full swing, there were no holidays too, arriving on a week day. He appeared physically sound, but for a saddened face.

All their desperate pleas fell in deaf ear! He appeared calm and quite, while the storm that thickened inside him steadily growing wild. He met his friend, Priyom, and learnt that Deepa was regularly going to college as usual. They met, held each other as though two huge magnets of opposite pole caught hold, Deepa crying uncontrollably! They caught a taxi and arrived at their clandestine spot in Golf link. Deepa was desperate, that she could never think of another man coming into her life, let alone marrying some one called Nibir. That she would not wish any companion in the world but him. Suman must find a way to free her from this deathtrap! They would rather die together, a far better option, than to live separately, she marrying another man! Suman grew desperate, not knowing what to do,alluding him of any solution, bizarre ideas fleeting through his mind in wild flashes!……..

Binod had insisted that Deepa should stop going to college now that her marriage was imminent, exposure outside her home at this juncture was not auspicious and should be avoided. He was actually suspicious that she might try to get into contact with that lowly vermin. However, her mother resisted any restriction in her normal routine, including going to college, acutely aware that she was suffering from her own traumas, and not to add a new one to that. Other members too supported her. Having being vetoed, Binod had had his doubts, and so he thought he should warn that low caste’s parents from creating any nuisance by their son. As he knocked, it was Sumon who responded opening the door. Stunned at seeing him, immediately sensing that he came only to meet Deepa, rage erupted inside him. He somehow controlled himself from physically hurting him, but let his rancour out shouting with foul language, his parents by now beside their son. Binod left, with a stern warning, that any misadventure would bring about unforeseen consequences.

Gloom and dejection overpowered Suman, At his deepest core, wild unfulfilled longing for Deepa became too painful, giving rise to a sense of despondency that clouded every coherent thought! He would convince Deepa! He would convince Deepa that they would be together, inseparable in their next life! This birth was only intended for them to meet and love each other, for their souls to be united, but their ultimate union is ordained in their next birth, yes, in their next birth!! As the thought surged in him, he became insanely elated, a sensation of deja vu spread through him!…………! As the thought took firm root, he became restless, he would be together with Deepa today itself, delay was unbearable!!

Reaching home, Binod described his chance encounter with Suman, carefully avoiding to mention that he had visited their home. He was convinced that the rascal had come home with only one intention, and that this time he would certainly break his neck. He again vehemently objected to allowing Deepa go to college, lest that scumbag tried to meet her again. Mother was adamant, she would not allow her daughter to be in chains, in whatever way. Overhearing vehement arguments with her being the centre of discord, her desperation to escape surged into hysteria, frenzied thoughts overpowered her. She would escape from this world, if need be, to be consumed by her beloved!!

They met again, sat behind a thick bush further away from their usual spot, away from public gaze, she leaving early from her classes, locating Suman waiting for her, who had this day left home much earlier than usual, intending to meet her as she would be coming to college, but this time carefully avoiding their mutual friends. She broke down with teary eyes, “I would not be able to meet you again, Bapda is suspicious, he would not allow me to leave home anymore, today I somehow managed to come but no more”! Holding her hand, he spoke desperately,” Papa has booked my return ticket early tomorrow morning, he would not allow me to stay a day further, this is my last chance to see you, even today I sneaked out without their knowing”, and then he whispered in a tone possessed ,” listen, I had thought over and over, rebirth in our next life is possible. I have read so many such real life stories, where the two souls have united in their next birth, some of which has also been made into movies! I realised that this life is for ours to love, our souls to be intertwined, for karmic relationship by cosmic providence, but the ultimate culmination of our love is destined for our next birth, I am convinced of it! Let us leave this unkind and hostile world to hasten our union in next life!” She felt kind of a paranormal elation, goose bumps appearing at the thought of being consumed by her beloved, a tunnel vision of next birth driving both, shutting out all other reasonable thought, and they lay there holding each other closely, waiting for evening darkness!! The darkness appeared to descend quickly with a dense fog, with no other mortal anywhere in sight. The dense pine trees, now looking like tall silent demons with their dark hair swaying rhythmically in delight, as if in anticipation of an imminent schadenfreude, deriving a diabolical pleasure in their misfortune! The thick black bushes all around now seemingly in wait for nocturnal pray like predators. An icy wind suddenly blew, drowning the silence with its abrasive hissing. The duo got up, holding each other, oblivious to the pitch black darkness surrounding them.They walked along the vast expanse of the grassy slope, carrying the inky night, as they proceeded towards their destination, trance like, as if, driven under a spell! Dark clouds gathered high above the moonless starless sky, random fireflies accentuating the darkness!

Their usual time for return long past, everyone at home grew anxious, mother straining to look further towards the road from the edge of the gate.Father walking down the road a distance, waiting and returning, worriedly looking at his wife, unknowingly trembling with a rising panic! Eldest son, a dark thought growing inside him, made a thorough check around the Ward’s Lake, though he was convinced that they would not be there, and then hurriedly came to Sumon’s residence. He found his mother anxiously walking up and down, father pacing further down the road with a worried frown on his face. He burst out shouting,” your son has eloped with Lalima, only wait till I drag you all to the jail with your bastard son!” He stormed out agitated,without waiting for their response, coming straight to the police station to lodge a complaint! The younger brothers sought out Munmi and Priyom, half expecting to find their sister.Both were at home, unaware, saying she saw Deepa in the college early before the classes started but thereafter, she did not see her. Both of them immediately went out looking for them in that gloomy night, going to the Ward’s Lake and then to the Lady Hydary Park. Uncertain, they ventured out to the Golf Link a few distance, but hurriedly returned feeling creepy in the eerily silent foggy night, missing the approaching zombie like couple by quarter of a mile away!

They arrived at the Ward’s Lake, with no one in sight, pitch black darkness engulfing every nook and corner, with only a blurred cacophony of noise emanating from the water below, created by the swarm of fishes, frolicking undisturbed in their watery abode! They climbed the foot bridge like somnambulists, tightly holding each other, stood at the centre embracing! As if in a reverie, Deepa wanted that they be tied, so that even when transcending into the next birth, they should be together!! Suman found a thick rope on an idle boat moored nearby on the lake below, and used it to tie themselves tightly together, now standing at the edge of the foot bridge in the centre!! Out of nowhere, the dark clouds burst open, thunder and hailstorm pouring down!! As a deafening streak of thunder reverberated, illuminating the chilling darkness, they fell with its impact, their combined weight pulling them deep into the depths of the icy water below……..

With increasing alarm and anxiety, Deepa’s mother stood exhausted, her left eyelids twitching involuntarily, holding on the wooden gate for support, straining to look beyond the darkness along the road, ignoring repeated pleas to get inside home! As the lightning thunder rumbled across the dark sky lighting it up for an instant, the hailstorm pouring down, she instantly felt an overwhelming emptiness in her bosom with an unbearable agony spreading through her. She sat down on the road unable to move, completely drenched in the utter cold………

Expecting any moment that her son would be walking back home, she continued her vigil on the roadside, oblivious to the darkness that befell with the thickening night,ignoring the exhaustion that overpowered her! Her beloved son would be coming back exhausted from the whole day’s outing, famished, she would feed him with his choicest recipe, she would off course scold him for keeping his parents in anxiety for so long. ” are you not wary that your mummy is worried for you waiting! don’t you have any concern for your mummy! I will give him a good thrashing when he comes back! Let him come back!! why is he so late today!!!” And so she kept mumbling unto herself! The abrupt streak of lighting and the deafening thunder, with the accompanying hailstorm pouring down, made her suddenly feel an overpowering sadness, beyond her rising anxiety and panic, and grief stricken, she fell down on the road unconscious!………..

Their combined weight pulled them deep down into the icy water, the sudden impact paralysing both, arousing their survival instinct, trying to free themselves of the bondage holding them together, simultaneously inhaling for air! Icy water flowing through the nostrils, sans air, made them twitch and turn in agony, lungs and brain rejecting the substitute. The more they tried to free themselves, the more the soaking rope dug in deeper into the flesh. Struggling against the rope, now hindering their frantic efforts to free themselves, they inhaled more water, aggravating further their intense suffering. Gulps of water pummelled into their lungs and viscera as they tried to breath in desperately through the mouth! Bereft of air, a terrible agony spread quickly numbing all their senses! The throes of unbearable suffering persisted for a while, hands and legs twitching, jerking, every single cell hopelessly yearning for dear oxygen as life slowly but irreversibly ebbed, and for an instant, hallucination took over……

And then there was peace, complete peace! She was sleeping cosily in her mother’s lap, sucking her bosom as she was singing a lullaby, lovingly holding her! An apparition, as if a blue green yellowish glow seemed to lift her, she felt lighter than an air bubble, and then there was void, absolute, infinite void ………

With nimble steps he was running towards the outstretched hands, his mother lifting him up in a warm embrace, caressing his cheeks with her fragrant lips, and he happily closed his eyes in eternal bliss……..

Next day, their bloated bodies, with patches of blood stained fish bites, were found floating on the lake, tied together, rope dug deep into their flesh. In minutes, the bizarre incident spread like wild fire throughout the town.